Once upon a time there was a fairy tale. It was told by many people across the land and enjoyed by all. One day the big bad wizard from the land of the entertainment industry came in and found the fairy tale and corrupted the people. This wizard’s name was Hollywood. He took the stories we know and love and added guns and explosions and retold them… in 3D.
In my youth I remember the story of Jack and the Beanstalk. It was simply about a boy who buys magic beans that grow into a giant beanstalk that he then proceeds to climb and rob a innocent giant of his pet goose. Nowhere in this story do I remember Jack being a medieval giant slayer. This is one of the lies Hollywood come to want to make us believe.
There is the story of Snow White. A princess who is “fairest of them all” is banished to the forest by her evil stepmother. There she meets seven dwarves and lives happily ever after.
Nowhere in this story is she hunted by Thor! Hollywood made Snow White into a warrior princess that chops heads off and takes names.
Probably one of my favorite fairy tales ever, Hansel and Gretel, has also fallen victim to Hollywood. It started as the story of a couple of kids whose father abandons them in the woods. There they fall into the clutches of the evil witch and are lured inside her candy kingdom. After fattening up on sweets the witch tries to cook them alive and eat them. The witch fails, is pushed into the oven, dies and the children live happily ever after. That’s it. End of story. BUT NO! Hollywood had to rear its ugly head in and turn those sweet little children into tough, gritty witch hunters.
This is an outrage. Hollywood is running out of ideas of his own so he is changing stories already established thinking they will be blockbuster hits. The problem is that these are stories we already know and like. What Hollywood needs to do is come up with fresh new ideas. It seems that every new release weekend includes at least one movie that is a prequel, sequel, remake or horrible rip-off a movie or story we already love. I may just be channeling my hatred for the “Scary Movie” franchise here but really, their use of satire is really not funny.
Originality is dying and if something doesn’t change soon the industry will turn into nothing but repeated movies. A sequel should only to be used to continue a movie where the previous one left a cliffhanger. Who isn’t anxious to see the thrilling sequel to “The Hobbit”? When done right prequels are very informative. By coming with fresh angles like the “Star Wars” trilogy or “The Hobbit” Hollywood is responsibly not retelling stories but carrying on where it left off.
